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Red Death recipe



1/2 oz vodka

1/2 oz Southern Comfort® peach liqueur

1/2 oz amaretto almond liqueur

1/2 oz triple sec

1/2 oz sloe gin

1/2 oz lime juice

orange juice



Pour all ingredients (except orange juice) into an ice-filled collins glass. Fill with orange juice, and serve.



The Red Death...sometimes a simple potion just isn't strong enough. Legend has it that this potion came about by accident really. Ages ago...The Middle Ages if I'm not mistaken, alchemists were working diligently for the mixture that would transform lead into gold. Southern Comfort was just a small business on the side for the serfs...whose full time job was evidently slavery to a king or queen in those days.



Well it so happens that an alchemist of the time, one Giovanni Boccaccio of Florence by name, was a bit more concerned with creating a mixture that would slow the black death or bubonic plague. You see many of his contemporaries were having trouble with the 'lead to gold' thing and quite a few of them also seemed to be dying from the plague. Boccaccio figured that by learning the secret to surviving the plague, he'd have more time and less competition in solving the age old 'lead to gold' riddle.



Now the potion he came up with using the above listed items was powerful and unfortunately, killed him. Truly though, it wasn't his fault, because he wasn't used to having to ingest his ingredients so he had mixed this potion together in his usual way in his usual cauldron without cleaning it or thinking of sanitation of any kind. Apparently the lead cauldron he always used for mixing gave him lead poisoning...and because he didn't clean it out, he also gave himself mercury poisoning, nickel poisoning, zinc poisoning, and umm poison poisoning (he had a bit of a poison business on the side - always clean your tools kids).



Still, years later, his potion recipe was found and it was discovered that had he prepared this elixer in an even semi hygenic method, he would have been able to in fact stop the Black Plague with his wonderous potion. Tough luck that eh?



Now how does this potion come in handy today? We've pretty much seen the end of most cases of bubonic plague and so what's the use right? Wrong. See if we're right, and this potion is ingested by a person without the bubonic plague, he actually becomes infected with this potion. We've not tested it but records show that anyone ingesting enough of this potion was soon banned from social functions for the duration of the potions effects. We can only assume this was because of their sudden danger as a disease carrier.



Edgar Allen Poe is believed to have given this drink it's name and while he was never recorded to have carried the bubonic plague, he was a notorious drunk and never really had friends that could ban him socially to begin with. He also wrote a story believed to be influenced by the affects of the potion and while leaving the potion itself out of the story, he is said to have consumed a great deal of the potion while writing it and up to his death years later from what is believed to be alcohol poisoning.



Well there you have it. This potion is a plague creator. Serve it to your friends...or your enemies. If you like a good stiff drink then go ahead and have a few belts yourself. Worst case scenario, you end up drunk for years and dying early of alcohol poisoning but you also might leave behind a treasure of creep and macabre stories so no harm no foul right?

Holy Water recipe



2 oz vodka

1 oz triple sec

1 oz light rum

fill with tonic water

1 dash grenadine syrup



This is a POTION not the real stuff used by priests and such. Vampires rest easy, please. For an explanation, we turn to the seventh listed definition of 'holy' in our dictionaries:



ho·ly [hoh-lee] adjective, -li·er, -li·est

7. inspiring fear, awe, or grave distress (see holy terror).



The 'Holy Water' potion is designed to do just that...inspire fear. We've worked hard to find the right ingredients that when combined with proper ritual are sure to create panic or at least mild caution on the part of everyone around you. The key is to recite the incantation just right.



When we were making this potion we tried numerous incantations and rituals to combine the effects of the potion with a strong magical counterpart. We had some positive results (one of which resulted in cash falling from the ceiling - but who really needs that in a potion)...and some bad results (which unfortunately did end up with us accidentally summoning Azathoth - arch demon of Cthulu - who while quite awe inspiring visually is really a lousy house guest and ate a few of our researchers...that's the cost of doing business really). But we found one that worked surprisingly well in every test run and didn't fail in our final assessment tests.



So, combine ingredients in a rocks glass over ice. Fill with tonic water, then add one dash of grenadine. Be sure the potion is served with the tonic still bubbling. If you're concerned about getting the right measurements, have your local mage, wizard, or bartender help you out.



Get right down in front of the glass and stare deeply into the bubbling brew. Then without warning shout repeatedly these mystic and powerful words taken from the ancient chinese magician Xu Fu of the Qin Dynasty (221 BCE - 206 BCE) that were uttered shortly before his death.



"Iyme offff mye-medee-kayshun!"



Then watch as the spell takes effect. It's known that this mystic incantation will actually have strong effects on it's own but when combined with the potion, erie mists will push forth from the elixer and as you drink it, those mists will flow throughout the room (or bar) and cause fear and panic among anyone not sufficiently protected with their own potions. As you run about the place screaming your incantation you'll see the terror in the eyes of everyone around you. Backing away from the mists and smoke that pour out of your mouth.



Side Effects: If too much of this potion is ingested, the incantation loses power or changes it's magical results. This is often because rather than shouted with the strength and will of purpose necessary for the right effects, too much of the potion causes the incantation to be slurred and mumbled and accompanied by some drool out the corner of your mouth and perhaps loss of consciousness altogether. The magical effect of this is usually someone simply throwing a towel over your head and everyone ignoring you for the rest of the night...which is really quite different from the fear and terror you're trying to achieve.